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Cold Fish (冷たい熱帯魚, Tsumetai Nettaigyo) (mild spoilers): a mild-mannered fish-shop owner crosses paths with a larger competitor who at first seems like an ideal business partner – but that veneer doesn’t last long. It feels like the director started out with two completely separate film ideas; the first 1-hour 45 contains a pretty credible, low-key, tense, but slow-burning con-man drama – with an off-kilter / black comedy undercurrent. The final act transforms the film into a full-blown slasher – which dwells on depraved sex, violence, gore and some body disposal scenes for a little longer than would be deemed comfortable (or necessary), peaking in a hyper-messy crimson-soaked blood ‘n’ guts finalé – shock cinema at it’s best; or perhaps worst! This wouldn’t usually be a big deal, but at 2.5 hours you could have cut two (better, and) entirely different 90-minute movies out of it – an Evil Dead style gore-romp, or Coen–esque black comedy. There are glimpses of superb direction and storytelling, straight off the bat, but they end up getting lost in the bigger-picture. Acting is also solid (the runaway star being leading man Mitsuru Fukikoshi’s full-bodied transformation) – although, along with everything else, it all gets watered down and lost within the superfluous runtime. This would, by normal standards, be anything but an ordinary film – particularly because it’s littered with gropey and sensational sex scenes – but when you’re following up from an epic like Love Exposure, this feels lukewarm in comparison.

Score: 5/10

Savages

November 25, 2013

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Savages (mild spoilers): when two pro pot dealers have their shared girlfriend kidnapped by a cartel for leverage, they don’t take it lying down. This one is absolutely packed to the brim with torture, violence, action sex, drugs and rock & roll – it’s all turned up way past 11. All the characters are all pretty broad stereotypes, however it’s the cast and story that raise this above your standard gang-banger flick. Hell, it’s worth watching this just to see the scene with Del Toro and Travolta – each doing their thing and loving every second of it. For a 2hr30 film, it’s so packed with action and plot that it never drags: as it plays out like a dramatic chess match. Savages barely puts a foot wrong until it doubles back on what would have been a powerful, Shakespearian out-of-the-blue ending – instead copping out at the last second for a crowd-pleaser. The only real downer for me was a sloppy, grating, “ike-OMG-totally-I-was-like-and-she-was-all” So-Cal voiceover that does nothing more than point out the obvious – and annoy the shit out of viewers. After a couple of duffers, this one definitely puts Oliver Stone back on the cinemap, and with ample style to spare.

Score: 7/10

Ghost Shark

November 20, 2013

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Ghost Shark: when a wounded shark floats into a satanic cave and dies its ghost comes back with a vengeance, leaving any amount of water unsafe: swimming pools, baths, puddles, cups, even rain! What do you want from a SyFy direct-to-video film called “Ghost Shark”? Bikinis and gore per chance? For a 15-rated shark romp there’s an abundance of both: the film uses every scene as an excuse to show some bikini-rocking babes, and there’s a bunch of great gore moments – people being bit in half, split in half, pulled down toilets ass-first and chomped into tiny buckets of soapy water – it’s all well beyond what you’re used to from these films. Despite the knowing tongue-in-cheek feel of the film it’s one of the better shot and acted SyFy affairs (for what that’s worth!) I’m not even going to start on the plot, because, well it’s about a shark that is a ghost – and the title alone should tell you everything you need to know about the level of the film. While Ghost Shark won’t be winning any Academy awards next year, it tears chunks out of the recent slew of shark–based monster movies.

Score: 4.5/10

Filth

November 18, 2013

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Filth: a detective gunning for promotion is also heading for a breakdown, but how long can he keep his many plates spinning? This is the latest movie adaptation of an Irvine Welsh book, and feels like it’s going for a “Trainspotting for the teenies” angle. It would be silly to complain about the content of a film called Filth, but in case you need a heads-up: it’s crammed with deviant sex & sexuality, drug use, violence, and oodles of fantastically creative swearing, amongst other things. The over-emphasis of the of the craziness going on in Bruce’s mind – hallucinations, binges, sex, porn – don’t really detract from the story, because Bruce’s nose-candy nose-dive IS the story. Despite all the headline-grabbing controversial content crammed into this, the main talking point is undoubtedly James McAvoy’s performance; in an era where leading men no longer required to be likeable or even remotely empathetic, he works wonders with the few tiny slivers of humanity he gets. My biggest concern of the picture however is it’s extremely unflattering – and wholly unrealistic – take on Scotland and it’s culture: if it’s not films about the Loch Ness Monster, it’s about the druggies of Trainspotting, Red Road, NEDS, and now Filth – the Scottish tourist board must really hate our film industry.

Score: 6.5/10

The Starving Games

November 12, 2013

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The Starving Games: A Hunger Games spoof from the team that brought you Disaster Movie, Meet the Spartans, Epic Movie and Scary Movie. Not wanting to limit the laughs, the film takes potshots at pretty much everything and everyone in popular-culture: from big movies, celebrities and memes, through to the obligatory staple poop jokes and voyeuristic camerawork. There’s a few good movie-related quips – “His only Facebook friend is Mel Gibson“ etc – but for the most part, the movie just takes a scene from The Hunger Games, makes it silly, throws in a bunch of pop-references and rolls with it. Some of the humour’s good, although every joke gets stretched out to the point that it’s no longer funny. At 70 minutes it feels pretty light – and even then, a lot of the runtime is made up of a dozen reaction shots for every joke. The production’s high for this kind of film, and the impersonations in particular are surprisingly good in the looks and accent departments. If your expectations are realistic, and you like the movies mentioned in that first sentence, there’s no reason why you wouldn’t dig The Starving Games – and even if you don’t like these kind of movies, there’s got to be something in here that will make you laugh as it’s not half as smelly as you’d assume.

Score: 3/10

Dexter

October 16, 2013

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Dexter (Season 1): Miami’s top blood-splatter expert has a nice little hobby of dispensing the city of its criminals that the justice system spits back out. I know it’s the first season and everything needs to be established, but there’s no need for the dialogue (and lazy voiceovers) to be this wincingly bad: “This box is like me, completely empty,” “if I had a heart, it would be breaking…” WE GET IT, You’re an emotionless sociopath! THIS IS THE PREMISE OF THE SHOW – DUH!!! Dexter’s (Michael C Hall) acting is also good, or bad, enough (hard to tell when he’s playing a psycho) to convince us he is truly cold, and always trying to act normal. Plot-wise, the bigger “ice Truck Killer” story is far more interesting than the scumbag of the week episodes, however they do reinforce, and slowly let you see Dexter’s M.O. which is interesting to watch. Dexter Season 1 has some good watching in it; and features TVs smoothest asexual, and most supportable vigilante.

Score: 7/10

Sniper: Reloaded

October 8, 2013

Sniper: Reloaded – when his team are ambushed by a single shooter, a marine goes behind enemy lines to draw the sniper out and avenge his fallen comrades. For a b-movie, the action in this is surprisingly strong and intense; unfortunately the filler between these big set-pieces is fairly standard. Unbeknownst to me, this is the 4^th film in the series, but you don’t have to have seen the rest to understand this; although they may explain the unprecedented overuse of ‘shoulder touching to convey trust’ symbolism. Most importantly, for a film about snipers, pretty much all of the famous / trick shots are in there: kill through a wall, one shot – two kills, thread the needle through another sniper scope. It’s also aided by some stunning wildlife & nature shots and a gratuitously bad all-holds-barred sex scene. For a no name cast (other than Billy Zane, who kinda feels at home here) and no budget, Sniper: Reloaded shouldn’t be nearly as good as it is, but the action, cinematography and setting make up for shortcomings in the script and story departments.

Score: 6/10

Benda Bilili!

October 3, 2013

Benda Bilili!: documentary spanning five years from the creation, to the eventual success and acclaim, of a street band from the Congo, 5 of whom happen to be paraplegics. Given the tough upbringing and background of the musicians, it’s truly inspirational to see them always looking at the plus side, as well as their determination to succeed. Your shanty house burnt down? Things like this happen in life, get over it! The music is excellent, given that it’s self-taught musicians, playing beaten up guitars and homemade instruments (like a string and stick attached to a can). Unfortunately, the doc gets pretty French in parts, with some long spiels of philosophizing on the streets, rather than just telling the amazing story. The balance of the movie is also a little off, with most of the runtime dedicated to the struggle and hardship, and not nearly enough celebrating the success and rewarding good times. Still, Benda Bilili is an uplifting tale of adversity against all odds.

Score: 5.5/10

Arrested Development

October 1, 2013

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Arrested Development (Season 2): with George Bluth on the run, the family must march on without him, and Michael must keep the Bluth Company – and his family – under control. This is my third time watching through AD and in reflection it’s so obvious why a show like this was destined to fail on TV. The biggest problem is that the running gags are subtle, and would be easy to miss if there were 7 days (let alone weeks) between the episodes. With the DVDs however, you can bash through a season in a few nights and really appreciate the fine writing. In saying that, S2 tries to address this by having clusters of jokes that are confined to an episode; like the ‘Charlie Brown’ slow walking, Gene Parmesan, etc. The biggest step up for me is lot more brilliantly timed physical comedy: chicken dances, face pulling, slipping, and Mrs Featherbottom’s spectacular Mary Poppins moment. Once again the brilliant ensemble cast of comedic actors does great things with well-written characters. This should be mandatory viewing for anyone that enjoys comedy TV – almost a decade later and it still puts most shows to shame.

Score: 8.5/10

Arrested Development Season 2, Jason Bateman, Portia de Rossi, Will Arnett, Michael Cera, Alia Shawkat, Tony Hale, David Cross, Jeffrey Tambor, Jessica Walter, Ron Howard 2

“I just blue myself”

After Porn Ends

September 30, 2013

213070-afterpornends

After Porn Ends: doc that catches up with some porn superstars of yesteryear and sees what they’re doing having left the industry. This doesn’t feel much like a conventional documentary – there’s no narration, or much of a narrative for that matter, just feels like you’re listening in on people storytelling; which has some merits. The biggest surprise is how smart and pragmatic some pornstars are (one actress is in mensa!), but this feels short-lived as it’s quickly balanced out by the ridiculously vapid bimbo stereotypes that also show up. You have to be a unique person to enter this kind of work, and in a way that’s what keeps this watchable – these people have led quite fascinating, peculiar lives during their porn careers, then as an ex-porn star societal pariah. The most interesting – and telling – part of the film however is seeing what happened after the interviews in the pre-credit titles. In the same way that ‘Side by Side’ was about the transition in cinema, this feels a bit like old-timers reminiscing about the glory days / ‘golden age’ of porn. All in all, After Porn Ends is surprisingly watchable, yet it’s a little unforgivable that someone could stitch together a film this flat and ordinary when it features so many people with remarkable stories (like a world-record breakin’ gangbang featuring 500 men!), working in the world’s most taboo and sensational industry.

Score: 4/10

Tucker and Dale vs Evil

September 27, 2013

Tucker & Dale vs Evil: two standard horror-movie lookin’ rednecks are trying to enjoy some time at their new vacation home when a bunch of hot college kids come along and start killing themselves all over their land! This film turns every dumb & clichéd horror trope on its head and makes them laugh out loud funny – as you see events from the kid’s eyes looking like a dull horror movie, and from the misunderstood Tucker / Dale’s perspective, where it looks like a teenage suicide pact. The script’s funny, cast nail the comedy and there’s plenty of over-the top blood-n-guts to keep horror fans amused. Tucker & Dale is an awesome horror picture, for fans of the genre, that would make an excellent double-bill with Cabin in the Woods. Easily one of the best horror comedies around. Never judge a redneck by his blood-stained overalls! Smart, funny and highly original comedy horror.

Score: 8/10

The Midnight Meat Train

September 9, 2013

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The Midnight Meat Train (Spoilers): A struggling photographer finds more than just inspiration in late-night New York, as he stumbles across the reason why so many of the city’s people go missing. So, the average human body contains over four liters of blood – unless you’re unlucky enough to be on the Midnight Meat Train, where people have infinite blood. The film is everything that you think a movie called “Midnight Meat Train” would be. It’s a shady story that gets weirder and sillier as the film progresses, finishing with something so ridiculous and over-the-top. The acting’s alright for this type of film (gore, schlock, pure B-movie), but the characters are ridiculous. The lead goes from normal to psychotically obsessed within 2 scenes. My favourite thing about this film is that five years ago, Bradley Cooper was the leading man in a movie where an ogre-king pulls his fiance’s heart out, forces Cooper to eat it, before getting his own tongue ripped out! I don’t know if this could ever have been a good movie, but it’s the kind of film that would have worked a lot better if it was all done in Japan and in Japanese, and not just a J-horror director working in Hollywood, with an American cast.

Score: 2/10

Top Gun

September 6, 2013

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Top Gun: a hot-headed fighter-pilot is sent to train with the top 1% at the Air Force’s finest training school – Top Gun. This is one of those films I watched in complete disbelief, why is it that this has become such a popular, ‘must see’ movie? The best thing about it is the music, but even that’s criminally overused: Danger Zone pops up 3 times, and Berlin’s Take My Breath Away appears 4 times!! The aerial combat scenes (central to the plot) aren’t quite as fluent and obvious as you’d expect – with limited shots and a lot of rough cuts: it relied more on the pilot’s communications to keep you informed. Not much to say about the script, other than it’s terrible, beyond hammy, and packed with so much innuendo that they had to have deliberately been going for a campy vibe: one character actually shouts “I want some butts”. Kilmer and Cruise don’t have to do much other than oil up, stand about in towels covered in sweat beads, square up chest to chest and erotically whisper lines like…

“You’re dangerous”
“Yea, I know”
“You’re reckless”
“What about it”

It’s a film jammed with so much machismo that it unknowingly ends up mincing it’s way over to the ‘camp classic’ section.

Score: 4/10

Top Gun 02 Tom Cruise, Anthony Edwards, Kelly McGillis, Meg Ryan, Val Kilmer, Rick Rossovich, Tom Skerritt, Michael Ironside, Maverick, Iceman, Goose, Charlie, Slider, Viper

“I was invaded!”

Arrested Development

September 2, 2013

Arrested Development (Season 1): when the CEO of the Bluth Company gets jailed for fraud (and light treason), one son must step up and take charge while the rest of the dysfunctional family try to get back on their feet. This is an absolutely explosive combination of fantastic writing, stellar casting, and perfect comic acting / timing. The 20 minute episodes are so tight and neat – not a single word is wasted, and everything is relevant to the plot or character development, to be used somewhere down the line. For a comedy, every main character is funny, well-played and developed over the season. And, for something this upbeat and watchable, it’s remarkably dense, layered, lean & efficient. Arrested Development is the holy grail of comedy; fun for casual, first-time viewings, but rewarding for repeat viewings as you’re able to pick out more and more running jokes, themes and catchphrases. Unmissable comedy.

Score: 9/10

Pain and Gain

August 30, 2013

1 Comment

Pain and Gain: A group of dim bodybuilders kidnap and extort some rich folks. This basically takes a bizarre true-crime story and gives it the Michael Bay treatment (boob job, botox, facelift etc). If there ever was a director with an unsympathetically “In-Yer-Face!” style, it would be Mr Bay. Every female in this is a big-titted supermodel, there’s scenes in strip-clubs where the camera just stares at topless strippers (I felt bad for not tipping), there’s a raft of un-PC/racist jokes, there’s midgets, supercar fascination, drugs, pumped up bodies, dildos / sex toys, dick and homo jokes, and generally everything is over-styalised, and turned up way past 11. In fact; Rebel Wilson’s token crude material is probably the least offensive thing in this. The direction is equally aggressive; resembling high-end music-videos with vibrant colours, rapid cuts, loud music, a superficial glaze, and plenty on-screen stamps/graphics reminding you of what you should be thinking. And having this much character narration is just plain-old sloppy for a director that’s been around as long as Bay. Despite all of the unlikable elements coming from behind the lens, at least he chose some of the most sympathetic and charismatic actors to front the movie: Wahlberg, The Rock, Anthony Mackie… however, these guys are playing cold-blooded, pre-emptive killers, who are picking on hard-working, self-made targets – hard to empathise with. On the upside, there a lot of laughs to be had in this, although they’re mostly at the expense of someone. There’s a fascinating story buried somewhere in this film, but you have to look so far behind all of the bullshit surface that it’s almost impossible to pick out – would have been much better as a less sensational, properly-handled movie.

Score: 5/10

Lone Wolf and Cub: Baby Cart to Hades

August 29, 2013

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Lone Wolf and Cub: Baby Cart to Hades (子連れ狼: 死に風に向う乳母車, Kozure Ôkami: Shinikazeni mukau ubaguruma): Ogami Itto saves the honour of a prostitute, which leads to more work as a hired assassin. It’s yet another film that’s packed with effortless cool – slicing down the bamboo trees, ninjas fall down, Bish! Bash! Bosh! Corpses everywhere! This is definitely more wordy than the previous two outings, and the first half is overly similar to a previous story (protecting prozzies honour). The second half isn’t that memorable either, at least not until the absolute bloodbath of a finale. Wakayama plays his character with far more grit than before, he’s colder, and his dialogue is delivered with the most authoritative growl you could imagine. Poor kid though, how much bloodshed should one child be exposed to!?!? Another big game-changer is that this is the first movie in the series to feature guns, which takes the edge – and part of the appeal – from the sword fighting / showdowns. Whilst it’s not a bad film, Baby Cart to Hades isn’t really in the same league as the first two movies, and feels like it’s re-treading some plotlines.

Score: 5.5/10

Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa

August 27, 2013

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Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa: North Norfolk’s best DJ finds himself in the middle of a hostage situation. Well, when all other characters fail, thankfully there’s always Partridge for Coogan to fall back on. As far as the comedy goes, this is easily one of the funniest films of the year; the writing and delivery are both fantastic, it’s a great heist farse, and – most crucially – it’s as quotable as the best Partridge to date. I also love how it’s all so British, but in such a loving and honest way; the throwaway lines and small encounters, the cultural references, down to the one-hit-wonder heavy ‘Classic Rock’ / ‘Dad Rock’ soundtrack that really aids the movie’s feel-good tone. Anyone with doubts as to whether or not the TV star can sustain a feature-length will be monumentally converted. The film also stays true to the TV show, with appearances from regulars Lynne, Michael, DJ Dave Clifton, and Sidekick Simon – although it would have been good to see a few more cameos (Dan, Tex, Sonja). I just wish that Coogan would stop getting his bum out ever time he’s in a film. Let’s be honest, Alan Partridge is a national treasure, and most fans were apprehensive about a movie; that being said you couldn’t ask for more of Alpha Papa, it’s simply a great comedy film that will be appearing in many critic’s lists at the end of the year.

Score: 9/10

Pacific Rim

August 13, 2013

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Pacific Rim: in 2013 the earth starts getting periodically attacked by huge monsters (Kauji – a term for Japanese monster movies), so humanity pulls together and builds equally massive robots (Jaegers) to fight back. This is a big, loud blockbuster in every sense: characters, sets, costumes, fights, monsters, robots, and plot are all turned up to 11 for the full +2 hours. Unfortunately, because the fights are so big and mostly at sea / underwater or at night, it’s pretty hard to know what one big thing is doing to the other big thing. As a lazy comparison, think Real Steel Vs Godzilla as a 3D computer game. Other than the dizzying fight-scenes, everything else looks fantastic, and there’s enough strands running alongside the generic monster-movie plot to keep you occupied. Not a bad film, but it definitely aims more at the eyes than the brain: a monster/mech movie made by a monster/mech fanboy.

Score: 6/10

Cedar Rapids

August 9, 2013

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Cedar Rapids: when ‘Brown Star’ (the best joke in the film) Insurance’s top sales guy dies they have to send a sheltered nerd to the regional insurance conference to win the prestigious “two-diamond” industry recognition. It’s billed as a ‘hilarious’ comedy, but let me break this down for you; John C Reilly is funny, Anne Heche is semi-funny, nobody else is funny at all. On paper, this is a great idea: a bunch of insurance nerds ripping it up at a corporate weekend – but it’s just not done correctly. A character from The Wire makes several references to The Wire, for no real reason – and the way everyone talks to each other is ridiculous, as if a child wrote parts of the script. Worst of all, not a whole lot of the jokes are funny – it’s definitely humor, not humour! The direction, look and feel are all classic American Indie – in the vein of Win Win, Away We Go, The Informant! – but it’s nowhere near that level. It feels like a studio said to a director “we’ve got this film that needs to be made, get all your friends on it”. As far as “Fish out of water” stories go, this could have been amazing, but the execution just isn’t there.

Score: 2.5/10

The Happiness of the Katakuris

August 7, 2013

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Happiness of the Katakuris (カタクリ家の幸福, Katakuri-ke no kōfuku): a family move to the country to realise the father’s dream of opening a Bed and Breakfast – but it gets a bit weird when all of their guests start dying. The film opens with clay-mation sequence, and throws a load of equally unusual elements at the viewer for the duration: musical numbers (some with Karaoke sing-a-long), zombies, trippy dream sequences, a flying sailor, and a whole lot of gallows humour. To say it’s eclectic is definitely an understatement. Most of the characters are simply drawn, single-attributed batshit crazy people, which makes for entertaining viewing. There’s loads of jokes, but the humour is like no other, a mix of absurd, random and surreal. A re-make of the Korean film “The Quiet Family” (it went down the straight-faced, black-humour route), Happiness of the Katakuris couldn’t be more different. It’s one of those “crazy Japanese films” that could only really come from Japan, and that makes people think that every Japanese film is mental. It’s a tough one to score and review: you couldn’t really call this “a great film”, but it’s definitely unique, original, and every bit as entertaining as it is baffling.

Score: 6/10

Now You See Me

August 5, 2013

Film Reviews, Japan-O-Rama

Now You See Me: four lowly street illusionists/magicians are brought together to become the world’s most infamous magic show. Unfortunately, this film is just as obsessed with the special effects as it is with telling what’s quite an interesting story. Every time there’s a big trick or set-piece the camera starts whirring around in a physically-impossible, mind-bending and distracting manner. The plot is very entertaining, lots of humour and the story takes some major twists and turns before arriving at a surprising conclusion. The acting’s all solid, but in a film with Eisenberg, Harrelson, Fisher, Ruffalo, Laurent, Caine and Freeman – you shouldn’t don’t expect much less. In a time of infinite re-boots, re-makes and superhero movies – Now You See Me feels surprisingly fresh and different – big cast, and a great story, although spoilt by some flashy direction.

Score: 7/10

The Wolverine

July 31, 2013

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The Wolverine: In a way, Wolverine epitomises everything about Japan that you see through Hollywood films: there’s ninjas everywhere, and everyone knows Katrate; crazy districts full of neon lights and big billboards (Shinjuku and Akihabara); old-fashioned houses with sliding shoji walls and tatami floors; technology and Robots everywhere (in this case a 10ft tall mecha-Samurai!!); temples, on every corner; Yakuza interference – obviously; love hotels, The Bullet Train (Shinkansen); and the Tokyo Tower is in the back of every city shot. Yet, whilst it’s using and abusing all of the lazy ‘This is Japan’ stuff we know, it doesn’t feel like it’s exploiting the culture – there’s a lot of nice touches, from the undestractable pachinko players, salarymen in Osaka looking for hostesses, and things like upright chopsticks in food.

As for the film itself, it feels like three completely separate movies. The first third is a rock solid, well-executed set-up starting in WWII, and laying the ground for the rest of the film. The middle feels like a dip into a tired and clichéd mystery/conspiracy storyline, and the finale – well that just feels like something from a spazzy sci-fi movie, with bald snake-women, giant robots with flaming swords and a whole lot of gratuitous OTT action. I’m surprised at the 12A rating in the UK, as it feels slanted towards a more mature audience than most comic adaptations – including a nice thread of Logan’s dry humour. The Jean Gray plot device is a little hammy, although never going to turn down Famke Yansen in a silky nightgown! Jackman’s on fire, he is the embodiment of Wolverine – down to his permanently-exposed torso – wouldn’t want to be the guy that will inevitably have to re-boot the franchise in 5-10 years as the new Logan. The Japanese cast are also all on form. Overall, The Wolverine is a pretty satisfying comic book movie, but the ever-changing story and tone prevent you from becoming fully immersed in the movie.

Score: 6.5/10

KOREAN INVASION!!! (Of Hollywood)

July 30, 2013

Features

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Since I started this site I’ve been bleating on about how much I believe that Korea is one of the strongest film industries in the world regarding the actors, directors and the canon of associated staff that it takes to produce world-class, top-notch films. It looks like Hollywood is finally catching up, recognising this talent, inviting the cream of the crop over to tinsel town. Here’s a list of my favourites that have made the jump, so far…

Director – Park-Chan Wook (박찬욱): easily Korea’s most famous cinematic export, and firmly established as one of the world’s greatest directors with over a decade’s worth of acclaimed movies, including; Joint Security Area, Sympathy for Mr Vengeance, Oldboy, Sympathy for Lady Vengeance, I’m a Cyborg But That’s OK, and Thirst. His trademark style? Meticulous direction, spellbinding visuals, powerful storytelling, and often violent & disturbing subject matter. When Hollywood came a-knockin’ he managed to get Nicole Kidman, Jacki Weaver, and Tony & Ridley Scott involved in his first English-language movie – Stoker, which was well-received.

Actor – Lee Byung-hun (이병헌;): top of the K-actor pack in my books. He’s starred in some of the biggest and best Korean movies of all time: JSA: Joint Security Area, A Bittersweet Life, The Good The Bad The Weird, and I Saw The Devil. Has recently brought his Asian clout to Hollywood as ‘Storm Shadow’ in the past 2 GI Joe movies, and will appear in RED 2 this summer. He can do everything from rom-coms, to flawed heroes, to villains, and his 20-year career’s been so strong that he has his own Wiki page just for awards and nominations.

Director – Kim Ji-Woon (김지운): another director running with a hot streak of impressive movies: A Tale of Two Sisters, A Bittersweet Life, The Good The Bad The Weird, and I Saw The Devil. For his debut American production he managed to cast Arnold Schwarzenegger (and coax arguably one of his best performances after a long line of duffers), Forrest Whitaker, Eduardo Noriega, Peter Stromare, and the prolific Luiz Guzman. While it was not on the same level as his national works, The Last Stand far outshone Sylvester Stallone’s attempt at a similar genre movie – Bullet to the Head.

Actress – Bae Doona (배두나): Breaking out internationally in Sympathy for Mr Vengeance, and later The Host & Air Doll, Bae was picked up by the Wachowski brothers for Cloud Atlas, for which she was unanimously praised, sealing her a place in their next film, Jupiter Ascending.

Actor – Rain (Jung Ji-Hoon, 비): broke through with I’m A Cyborg, but That’s OK – and immediately jumped over to star in both Speed Racer and Ninja Assassin. Hasn’t done much since, but that’s OK too, because he’s also a singer, songwriter, dancer and model.

Director – Bong Joon-ho (봉준호): despite having less films than the previous two directors, they still pack a punch: Memories of Murder, The Host, and Mother, all being successful exports. Bong’s next film is the much-anticipated sci-fi thriller Snowpiercer, starring Chris Evans, Jamie Bell John Hurt, Tilda Swinton, Ed Harris, and…

.. Actor – Song Kang–ho (송강호): One of the most watchable and charismatic actors in Korea today, he has a magnetism that can only be described as ‘star power’ and a range that most actors can only dream of. Appearing in many of Koreas biggest movies: Shiri, The Quiet Family, JSA Joint Security Area, Sympathy for Mr Vengeance, The Good The Bad The Weird, and Thirst – I’m excited to see that Bong Joon-ho has pulled him across the Pacific.

As you can tell, it’s quite a tight and incestuous list, as the great combinations of elite directors and actors stick together, to create world-class film after world-class film.

But have they been good Korea moves for those involved? (Sorry, had to put that in) You could argue that something is being lost in translation, as the two released directorial efforts, although strong, aren’t on the same level as their previous works, and the actors, despite being in some big roles, are usually word-shy, or over-dubbed in post-production. To that, I would say… so what? Let’s throw Nolan, Scorsese, Bale, Fassbender and Streep into South Korea and make them do a Korean film, speaking Korean, and see how that sits with a completely different culture!

Remember this flag, as it may – someday – replace The Hollywood Sign!

Although it’s quite a recent trend, and a fairly short list in the grand scheme of things, I hope that this cross-pollination of talent continues, and shines a bright light on everyone’s previous – overlooked – work in K-Cinema.

Note: there’s a load of Korean Born / Korean Descendent actors that have spent the majority of their life working and acting in America like Rick Yune, Ken Jeong, Sandra Oh, C.S. Lee, John Cho, Sung Kang, Daniel Dae Kim and so on… but to include them would be cheating.

Edge of Darkness

July 29, 2013

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Edge of Darkness: when his sick daughter is gunned down, detective Tom Craven starts looking for people with a grudge against him, but maybe he wasn’t the target. This is a good-old corporation/government conspiracy film that feels like a throwback to the blunt movies of the 80s. There’s a few totally unexpected, and fairy graphic deaths that have genuine shock value, and get properly etched in your brain. The plot starts to feel like a runaway train, where the crazy and unbelievable things start piling up. We also get treated to a variety of terrible Boston accents, which make some of the dialogue difficult to catch. Gibson pulls out a decent performance, given his characters complex mental state – but everyone else can be filed under ‘hammy’ or ‘generic’. One final note, to Ray Winstone, please stop being Ray Winstone! Despite sitting on the Edge of Realism, Edge of Darkness is a decent, albeit depressingly nihilistic, action / thriller / revenge / conspiracy picture from the director that had the stones and talent to save the James Bond franchise twice.

Score: 5.5/10

Tekken

July 26, 2013

1 Comment

Tekken: after WWIII the megacorporation Tekken controls what was once North America, and is staging it’s annual ‘Iron Fist’ tournament. Obviously, for a film like this, actors are cast for their athletic looks over their talent – which leads to some god-awful line delivery from most people, but hey, at least they look very similar to their pixelated counterparts. The set-up is fairly good for this type of film, integrating a lot of detail from the game series. What drives Tekken is the action, and this film knows its audience, assigning about 2/3 of the runtime to 1 on 1 fights from the games, death-matches, or other action scenes. Despite being nothing new to the genre, Tekken is more watchable than most computer game conversions – and as good as any average cyberpunk / dystopian future movie.

Score: 4.5/10

The World’s End

July 25, 2013

2 Comments

The World’s End: five middle-aged friends re-unite to tackle the 12-stop pub-crawl that they never finished as teenagers. If you watched the trailer and thought that this looked a bit empty and silly then you’re completely right. No matter how good the director is (which he is), or how on-form the cast are (which they are) this is a great example that if you have a silly idea, you’ll probably end up with a silly film. It also has a few long stretches where there’s not many laughs – namely backstory. The cast are truly the best of contemporary British comedians, and a few bigger players thrown in: Paddy Considine and Pierce Brosnan, to name but a few – a well-picked bunch. The World’s End boils down to being a silly bodysnatchers movie that’s overflowing with 90s nostalgia, whilst pulling from some modern sources like Attack The Block, Hitchhiker’s Guide etc. Given the quality of Sean of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t expect more from The World’s End, still, it’s a decent Brit-Com, and a good enough way to close out the ‘Cornetto trilogy’.

Score: 5/10

The World’s End pub crawl route:

The First Post
The Old Familiar
The Famous Cock
The Cross Hands
The Good Companions
The Trusty Servant
The Two-Headed Dog
The Mermaid
The Beehive
The King’s Head
The Hole in the Wall
The World’s End

CZ12: Chinese Zodiac

July 19, 2013

Chinese Zodiac (十二生肖, CZ12): professional relic hunters scour the planet for 12 lost Chinese artifacts of the zodiac calendar. This most reminded me of The Extra Ordinary Adventures of Adele Blanc Sec – in that it’s a kids film with a big story, historical fantasy, and some PG-rated action. Speaking of which, no matter how many Jackie Chan action set-pieces you see, they never get tired or boring, and always have a jaw-dropping, unbelievable quality about them. It’s also a testament to his skills that even when he writes and choreographs the scenes – the ones where he’s not on-screen lack that special touch. Outside of the action, the film’s OK: a pretty standard globe-trotting, multi-lingual, universal-rating, big-name, big-budget, ‘big-appeal’ movie that’s been killed by committee. If this was only made of the JC action scenes you’d have to give this film a 10/10, however, the overly complicated story, continual flipping between languages, and some clunky CGI haul the overall product into the average zone.

Score: 6/10

Tokyo Story

July 18, 2013