Walkout: Coco Before Chanel

Coco Before Chanel: follows the early life of Coco Chanel, who would become one of the most important fashion designers in the world, like, totally, ever! So she starts out as an orphan, and slowly grows up / whores herself into the most ungrateful super-leech in the world; this character is so unlikable that you wonder why anyone in the film tolerates her, let alone why all of the men are fawning and fighting over Coco. Early 1900s France is a lovely setting but the story, and eventual romance, are tedious. I never, ever thought I’d watch a film like this and be craving more dress-making, tailoring, and general fashion talk… but that’s how boring everything else in the movie is. Above all else the snail’s pace destroys any hint of momentum; as the film dwells on gentry lifestyle, a sulking brat-like Coco and boring class-struggles.

I scraped through the first 90 minutes, couldn’t have given less of a crap about the final 20.

Alternative plans: left my lady to it and made my supper early – mentally filed this in my crammed cabinet of boring period dramas. Couldn’t get the Stellastarr* song ‘My Coco’ out of my head… so not all bad.   Other walkouts…

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3 comments
  1. But it’s… Chanel!

    But, really, I haven’t seen the movie myself although it’s on my line-up.

    I hope the supper you prepared was good?

    Like

    • Paragraph Film Reviews said:

      Honestly, the final 10 minutes looked like they were about fashion, the rest was just ridiculous nonsense about growing up an orphan and struggling in Olde France. Even the beautiful Tautou couldn’t save this, although she did a good job of making you hate coco.

      Like

  2. On the one hand I’d like to see this film because it’s about this iconic woman. However, it’s been out for about three years now and I still haven’t got around to seeing it..!

    Like

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